You Failed Miserably!

Dearest Daughters:


Your rooms look like shit! I have spent the better part of 2 weeks trying to convince you two that your rooms were top priority every night to get cleaned with no luck.

I was at my wits end yesterday morning when I went through the house – after everyone had left – and realized that your rooms were still disaster areas from the night before. I spent numerous text messages bitching and griping and STILL your rooms were not done last night!

I explained that you two will consolidate back into one room, because I would rather have ONE room to worry about than TWO. I figure that the WHOLE room by yourselves must be too much work and trouble and I don’t want to burden you anymore than what you can handle. Regarding the instructions to consolidate into one room: I feel this way there will be TWO people in ONE room to help get it cleaned in HALF the time – right?

Last night, I refused to express any anger from the morning events and went about cooking and talking like nothing had happened. I waited to see if either one of you would do what I told you to about your rooms – and nothing. I guess you figured I was in a good mood, so you didn’t have to mind.

Last night was a TEST and YOU BOTH FAILED MISERABLY!!!

I shouldn’t have to be in constant Drill Sergeant Mode for either of you to mind me or believe my threats. Period!

So to Kitty…

…my darling sweet sixteen-year-old. You just had a birthday last week and are quite old enough to drive and have a little freedom, but you have failed to ONCE get your chores done since we handed over the keys to the HUMMMER. In my pre-happiness that you were finally old enough to handle your own schedule and drive yourself places, I failed as a parent to recognize that apparently you are not mature enough to handle freedom AND your chores. My bad…

So let me help you out. When you get back tonight you will park the HUMMER in the garage and you will not drive it until you prove that you are mature enough to handle and appreciate the extremely generous gift your father and I have provided you! I want to help you help yourself, so by taking away the HUMMER, I am helping you realign back to what is important to OUR household – getting your chores done!

But my love as a parent doesn’t stop there. I see that you have two classes where your current average is below what is acceptable in our household. As you know, your grades come first even before your chores, and neither is being done to my standards. So, I have happily canceled all your private tennis lessons and practice this week in order to assist you in what should be most important in your life. I can see the weight of driving on your own, cleaning your room and doing your homework is a trifecta of burdens that you can’t handle at once.

Oh no, no, there’s no need to thank me. I am doing this for you in hopes that you will learn to appreciate what your father and I work our ass off to provide and that one day you will wake up and realize that the greatest moments and achievements in life will always come to you with a little hard work and dedication. The price of teenage freedom comes in the form of cleaning your room and keeping your grades up. If the price is not paid – your freedom is repossessed!

It’s a simple lesson in life to learn.

You will thank me later.

Now to Kiki…

…my dearest, kindest thirteen-year-old. Let me begin by asking, why the hell was I called to come take you a polo shirt to school today?! Was it a surprise this morning that after 2 years of wearing uniforms to school that you HAD TO WEAR A UNIFORM TO SCHOOL TODAY?!

Ummm. No words…

Your room is even worse than Kitty’s. For the entire summer you were gone, that room stayed spotless. You CAN NOT BLAME Doodlebug! It appears that you have too much shit. I will be happy to help you load up trash bags full of clothes, toys and makeup to give to another child, whom I’m certain would greatly appreciate the abundance you have been afforded.

Why does your room seem to get worse the more you try to clean it? You keep making piles and moving those piles around and finally you end up with several piles of what? Where the freak does it come from?! I can only assume you took the sheets and blankets off the bed in order to get ready for Kitty to move in with you, but seriously – WTF?!

I know you do your homework in your room and I can’t gripe about you being a straight A student, but I can’t help but notice that your TV is very distracting when it comes to cleaning your room. I have passed your room on numerous occasions to find you sitting your ass on one of the beds watching TV. You have been working on this room for TWO freaking weeks!

I tell you what, I know that between Choir and Tennis and homework and your chores, it is very stressful for you. I am going to help you too. I will be taking your TV out of your room and I have cheerfully canceled all of your private tennis lessons this week too. Because I can’t take away a car you don’t have, I can explain to you the benefits of exercising.

Now, I know you have been complaining about being tired and you think that your room is dirty because of someone – anyone – else, but I am here to tell you today that this week, you will be running 3 miles every day after school. Exercise creates energy and endorphins to help with your complaints and concerns. You are worth my time and effort and what kind of parent would I be if I didn’t address your grievances head-on! I love you and would never want to see you needlessly suffer from lack of energy or accountability.

Tonight, I expect you both to cohabitate peacefully. I have no problems sticking your asses on a mattress out in the garage – seriously – I don’t want to hear your frustrations at me taken out on each other.

I write this email with love. You WILL learn that you two have a life that most kids dream of – never take it for granted – because the Drill Sergeant in me has no qualms about setting your ass straight!

(After looking at your pictures, I'm pretty sure it has been a rule since BIRTH that you are not allowed to eat or drink in your rooms!)


ALL of your choices in your lives have positive or negative consequences. YOU are the only one that can make that choice for YOU. You are the only one that can decide to live easily with abundance in exchange for a few minutes of hard work and dedication, OR you can be grounded until you leave for college.

I think the decision is a no brainer – but hey? I can’t make it for you…

Milestones

Sixteen years ago yesterday, Mr. Strong and I welcomed a beautiful baby girl into this world.


She swears that we don’t look alike, but everyone else looks at her and thinks she’s my clone. (If only I had blue eyes and dimples...)

You decide.

Yesterday was a great day. She passed her driving test with an almost perfect score:

We were able to spend some quality mom/daughter time together before she had to report back to school and then as she dropped me off and drove away in the Hummer by herself, I. Broke. Down.

As a Sweet 16 Milestone arrived in her life, simultaneously one arrived in mine. For both of us it was a milestone of freedom. For her – her freedom is about driving herself around town and handling her busy schedule and appointments. For me – it was about watching my daughter take her first steps all over again.

I was scared and full of joy that she was “walking” and knew that her world would forever change with the physical ability to mobilize at her will. Yesterday, I was scared and full of joy that she was “driving” and felt all those same feelings as before. I knew her (our) lives would change forever in the knowledge that she was growing up.

Bitter-Sweet.

I know that as life passes us by, she will have a multitude of other milestones – as we will too – but, I feel comfort knowing that no matter how old she gets, she will always need us – as parents – to support and love her unconditionally.

And we will.

It’s funny how you realize when you become a parent, that you are living/experiencing life through another’s eyes. You get to experience your own life as an adult, but you also get to relive and make brand new memories for your kids of things you wanted to do or see at their age.

I’m not talking about spoiling my children. I’m talking about giving them a life that your inner child gets to experience too.

One day you wake up and hope and pray that you have taught them morals and ethics and they will strive to become even greater adults. And then you move on in the reassurance that you’ve set the foundations for them to make the positive choices they know will guide the circumstances of their future.

To Kitty:

I love you.

Vision Board Manifest Reality

Today, by baby (Kitty) turns 16. Tear :’’’’(


I will post about her birthday festivities tomorrow…

Today, I want to share with you another Law of Attraction moment. If you’ve read my blog for any lengths of time, then you know I have two visions boards – one at work and one at home.

Here is a snapshot of my work vision board:

Now look really close at the picture at the very bottom next to my calendar. Can you see what it is?

Here’s a closer look.

Right next to the Cadillac, I have a picture of an H1 Hummer and under the Hummer picture I have a picture of a slant back Jeep. I have been posting pictures of vehicles that I would want to get myself since the first of the year knowing Kitty would be taking possession of my vehicle.

Some of you that know me personally know that I have been struggling with what I want to drive for even longer than that. I’ve posted these extremely expensive vehicles on my vision board because?

Why not?! Why can’t I have a car of my dreams!? Besides, it was just a small picture that I printed and cut out and stuck on a cork board. I didn’t cost me a dime. Who cares if that H1 Hummer was over six figures! It was one of my dreams on a piece of paper that I took the time to focus on by finding the picture, printing it, cutting it out and then tacking it to my vision board. Five minutes...

The past few days have proved very interesting. I won’t go into a lot of detail, but needless to say I was sitting down at a dealership yesterday, about to fill out paperwork to get Kitty this car

when I got a phone call out of the blue.

This phone call changed EVERYTHING!

Within two hours I was sitting behind the wheel of this:

And now it’s mine.

The Universe conspired to get me what I truly wanted and I didn't hesitate to accept what the Universe had helped me manifest!

I can’t write enough, that when you focus on what you really want and give thanks for what you have, the Universe will align YOU with all you need to make it possible! Whether its money, a job, a contact or serendipity. The Universe WILL make it happen – as long as you focus and believe that it is possible. Five minutes of focused thought and activity of adding the Cadillac to my vision board was all it took. I’ve added so many other pictures that the Cadillac is barely visible – but it remained on my vision board to look at daily.

I have been very fortunate these past two years to remove items off my vision board into reality and add a ton of others.
I. WILL. NEVER. DOUBT. THE. POWER. I. HAVE. WITHIN. MYSELF. AND. BELIEF. IN. THE. LAW. OF. ATTRACTION. TO. MAKE. MY. DREAMS. COME. TRUE.

I'm living proof!

Today marks the day that yet another item will come off my vision board manifest into reality. My new Cadillac is not the same color, or year or package as the one in the picture on my vision board, but in my heart, I wasn’t trying to go for “matching” – I dreamed about driving a Cadillac with all the bells and whistles – that’s all.

Go out and create your vision board…

Dream HUGE...

I dare you…

EVERYTHING you want in this life IS possible!

Share Hope

It's Saturday, 7am and I'm writing.

For the first time ever, I am posting on the weekend. Today I want to share hope with someone that needs it.

Sometimes in life we all experience a shortfall in our income. We all experience the ability to ignore our health and weight. We lose loved ones and we lose relationships and we lose hobbies. Sometimes by choice - sometimes not. The feelings of depression and worthlessness set in and then you start to question how things got so bad - where did you go wrong and who else is to blame?

The fact is, no one is perfect and NO ONE is immune!

Most times the problem with people is that they can't see past their current circumstances. Doubt and fear set in and you get lost and overwhelmed. Your entire life is consumed by wanting - needing desperately to fix the unending problems.

Today I want to tell you that if you are experiencing one of the previous situations ----- let go.

Let go of all the worry, the anger the frustration---just let go. Say it with me, "I cast my debts, worries and fears onto the One within and I go free." Say it again with your eyes closed and really mean it! Hell, say it as many times as you need to until you believe that it is possible! (The One means Divine Intelligence or God or wherever your faith lies.)

We were not put on this earth to suffer and the more you worry about debts and health and relationships, the longer you will be stuck in the circumstances you are desperately trying to get out of.

NEVER DOUBT those words in the last sentence. NEVER.

Read the sentence again.

Amidst all the chaos and anxiety you need to remember all the things in your life that bring you happiness and gratitude. If you think that you've hit rock bottom and are frozen in time, then let me tell you this. Your life isn't over! Pull your head out of your ass and quit sulking in shit! You don't have too! It's time to take back control of your life!

If you are down to your very last dollar - give it away to someone that is far worse off than you - I can guarantee that there is somebody - and be genuinely happy for the other person. KNOW that as you help others without hesitation, the flood gates will bring back to you the things you need most in your life - especially money. If you can give away your last dollar or even buy some stranger's latte in the Starbucks' line, then you are telling the Universe that you are ready to believe.

There is hope and proof that each and every one of us can be as rich as we so choose. You just have to believe that you are worth the effort of concentrating on what you want in life instead of focusing on what you don't have! I'm living proof that you can turn every circumstance around in order to enjoy life again. Debt - Health - Relationships - I'm living proof!

One of these days I might write that testimonial, but today isn't about me. I will however, share with you how I changed and are still changing: by consciously focusing on what I WILL have and giving thanks for what I do have. I've had to really try hard to focus only on positivity and believe me - that shit is HARD! I've looked like I was possessed with multiple personalities - many of them bipolar. It's not always easy, but I consciously choose to pick my battles now. I don't like talking about anything negative anymore - debt, health or relationships. I know that if I indulge in those conversations I am adding the kind of energy that I don't want in my life. I haven't mastered the techniques by any means, but I am living proof that they work!

If you want to get out of debt or simply just have enough money to pay your bills and you are swarming with collection calls and people, I'm here to tell you - "I KNOW you will be okay. There is a way out." If you can write out a list of everything that you want to pay and have money for, then you can achieve what you currently think isn't possible.

So here we go:

1. Write down everything that is to be paid off - don't leave any bill off the list even if it's only $5 - write them from smallest to largest. Make this list on the largest piece of paper you own or find a poster board and hang it somewhere you will see it every day! (This helps with the psychology of accomplishment.) Then write a separate list of your monthly expenses/bills to make sure you are covering your highest living priorities and basic necessities.

2. Add a vacation or a new car or something else that you can picture yourself having to the bottom of your list. Think BIG! Each family member should add something.

3. Focus on and visualize using or enjoying the things on the bottom of your list and promise yourself - your family - that you will pay/mark off the debts on your list in ORDER! This is very important. Stay in order!

Now get to work.

As you begin to focus on the big items at the bottom of your list, you will start the Universe in motion to help you achieve those dreams. You will begin to mark stuff off your list and after a couple of months you will surprise even yourself at the power that has always been within your control. As you focus on your dreams at the bottom of this list and visualize your use and enjoyment - you lose focus on the worries, anger and frustrations.

Did your phone get cut off? Who cares?! Civilization lived hundreds of years without them!

Are bill collectors calling you? Who cares?! Tell them they're on the list and you will honor your debts in the time it takes you to get to them on the list. No pressure.

Let the anger and frustrations go - welcome in the relaxation that will take you one by one to the completion of your list. When it comes to money, KNOW that there is enough in this world that is making its way to you right now as long and you FEEL its possibility!

You are not your circumstances. You are worth the effort. You CAN create the life you want. You...YOU.

A couple of years ago I made this same list and stood in shock at a half million dollar debt figure. Wow! I added my dreams to the bottom and refused to believe it wasn't possible. My house was toward the bottom of my list and that is now almost paid for! Don't get discouraged - that is why you have a list from smallest to largest.

IT. WILL. WORK.

I look at my list everyday and you know what has kept my focus? #33. The day Mr. Strong and I write out that 3 million dollar check for the lead donation to help build the new Bynum School.

The world and all its money is yours...